Back to college

Had gone to a college to meet a prof. Was waiting for him in the teachers’ lounge in his department and there were other lecturers and profs hanging out in their leisure time.
I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the ladies were probably only my age.

Anyways there I was sitting twiddling my thumbs and thinking about my college days and grinning at the students' antics outside...when suddenly one of the ladies came to me and said "excuse me ..."

For a moment I forgot I was not a student anymore and the long forgotten college etiquette, of standing up when a teacher talks to you, blasted into me and I shot up from my seat...
The poor lady had just wanted me to pass a book to her, but my getting up so startled her that she dropped the things she was holding.

Anyways it ended up with both of us apologizing and me going my sheepish way.

Funny what lurks in the bottom of your subconscious to spring up and embarrass when you least expect it.

Rediscovering books!!!

For as long as I can remember books have been my most loyal and staunch friends. I could lose myself in so many different worlds with so many different people, sometimes even at the expense of whatever work I needed to do. (I've been known to bunk school/ college or work just so I could finish a book :-))
Some of my happiest memories include cutting classes in college to sneak into the library, sometimes just so I could smell that lovely perfume of old books. Hiding a book between my class notes and reading it while my lecturers droned on.
It used to amuse my friends and parents that I loved the smell of books and I do, it ranks right up there with newly soaked earth...mmmmm
But I digress....
The last few years I have hardly been into any libraries or book stores. I had discovered the eBooks and it was so much more easy to just read it off my computer as I am on it most of the time.
Last week, thanks to a friend, I had been to a book store after God Knows how many years... oh!!! what an experience. I had not realised how much I missed it until then. Though I was tempted to buy every book out there, I controlled myself to just three.
Reading them now was like falling in love all over again.

On the flip side, one of the books I got was a self help/ philosophical kinda book and reading it reminded me why I generally run from them ;-). Can't remember the last time I fell asleep so fast.

PS: Tamanna, I did like the Kavitha Dasavani you suggested I buy.... Thanks :-)

Rambling in to the night!

Its 00.35 AM and my work requires me to be here for another hour or so.
I am sooo sleepy I can't think straight.

I think I have been staring at my monitor for the last 15 minutes and not been able to make any sense of what’s on it.
I have a deadline for tomorrow.. but hey wats a deadline when u r half dead...

Two people are fighting over the mails and I am following it with some interest until everything smoothens out and everyone is friends again *sighhh* :-(

They have cut all access to the Net and I am sure I totally enraged by it....ummm!!!! yeah I am... totally ...

OK! I got this great idea suddenly to see if I can post a blog from my mail id.
I am punchy as hell… so will stop right here before …zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!

PS: Next day: hehehehe reading back, it sounds just like I was drunk and rambling... thought for a minute I should remove the post... but then Naahhh!!!

Losing Independence ?

Last sunday's "The Hindu"-> Open Page featured an article about Women Losing independence after marriage. It struck a nerve as I was discussing about something quite similar just a few days back.

The example the author had quoted was this. Her well educated and well employed colleague was engaged to a guy abroad and when she wanted to go out with some friends for a party, she called him for permission and he refused. The girl did not go.I bet the thought in most of your minds is "So what?"... right?Do you think if the guy had been in the girl's place, he would have even thought of getting her permission?

We were sitting at the canteen eating lunch and in the course of our discussion my friend casually commented, how his sister hated cooking but after marriage she has no say but to cook. Everybody noddded their head like it was something common (and sadly it is)

I know this lady who got a great job offer in India and her husband got one abroad. There was no question of her taking up her offer, instead she quit her job to follow her husband. Sounds Familiar???

A girl married off even before completing her studies and in the family way, Pronto!, despite her wishes. Why? "Its God's wish, what can we do?" (I had to bite my tongue to not say anything for that excuse)

After waiting the longest time, this friend of mine got a chance to go abroad. She was quite excited about it and she did leave too. Hardly four months later she was forced to come back ... her husband was not sent by his company and he was not ready to go on a dependent Visa.

In so many interviews with Kiran Bedi, they ask her how her family and husband have adjusted to her work and if they approve of it. Have you ever had the same questions asked of a male policeman?

I can go on quoting more examples...

Yes! I do know of a few cases (a very few instances) where the guy has adjusted to the girl's requirement. But in these cases the men are so feted for being so understanding (and don't mistake me, I am real glad to know and see such men do exist), while when the same is done by the girl it is taken for granted.

While there is a lot of talk about equality and modern thoughts, traditions and out dated values still bind us very tightly, stopping us from making much progress . :-(

Numbed to Violence?

Two weeks back in "We the people" in NDTV, the debate was "Have Indians become numbed and indifferent to Violence?"
The answer is a Big Fat YES. Everyday and I do mean every single day there is news of one or other death, maiming, massacre, suicide, murder and mayhem in the news.

A 14 year old girl and her 45 year domestic help are brutally murdered and the media, police and everyone involved are having a gala. Every bit of blood and gore is shown, multiple times a day... just in case someone misses it. The father of the child is suspected and all kinds of vulgar innuendoes are flying around.

Brother kills brother, parents kill children and vice versa, father abuses a 4 year old daughter and the court gives the guardianship of the child to the same father. Police brutality is a by word. Women cannot walk down a road and expect to reach their destination safely. Bomb blasts by terrorists and then bomb blasts for saving the people from terrorists... (like we had in Afghanistan). Irnoically enough in both the bomb blasts its only the innocent people who suffer. Hundreds dying due to drinking poisoned alcohol.

And the reaction from the masses varies from lurid, obscene interest to a total indifference.

And where humans stop killing, nature takes over.
78000 people were killed in Myanmar, thanks to Cyclone Nargis. 65000 people killed in China due to an earthquake. And this is just yesterday's news.

I guess the phrase "Familiarity breeds contempt" holds true here too.

Stereotypes

Girls gossip, girls love cooking and cleaning. Girls cry.
Guys just grunt for communication and don't even know what gossipping is all about, a Macho guy does not cook and definitely not clean. Guys dont cry.
Well! Hello! The ice age is over and its the 21st century. Grow Up!!!Maybe in the Ice age, the men hunted while the women kept the house.But now men and women work at offices and the old ways are no more.
I am sure there are girls who like to gossip... Just as much as guys do. Dont u dare deny it! for I see it every day around me.

During a tea break, my colleagues of the male variety, were cribbing about how women are not "domestically trained" anymore (Sounds like maybe a puppy???) and dont show any interest in cooking and cleaning. I obviously could not stand this kind of a statement so I casually mentioned that I dont like to cook. You could have heard a pin drop. Then a colleague with a most baffled look on his face turned to me and said "But you are a girl!!!!". Well Gee!!! thanks... I did notice that. But where does it say I have to like cooking?

I will vouch that some of the best food I have eaten were made by men and as for keeping a neat place. Well! anyone who is interested in living in a house rather than a pig sty would be neat. Why should that be gender oriented?
Girls cry and guys dont. I totally agree and my full sympathy to you guys. Its a great way to vent emotions and its closed to you just cause it will not be macho... well boohooo...
I really do get pissed with women who use their tears to get their way though...

People! look around you! It is one thing to do something because we enjoy it, but is it not unfair that tradition, peer pressure or stereotyping forces a person to do what they dont like or prevent from doing what they like?

Beautiful day!!!

Got up smiling... was sure it was going to be a beautiful day. Didn;t realise how prophetic I could be, especially as my office starts in the middle of the day.

Stepped out of home in to the cool weather. Walked to the bus stop, and the bus was late... of course.
Did I forget to mention that the weather in chennai is hovering at a low 110 with a humidity factor, thanks to a depression in the Bay of Bengal, of infinity. And the weather guys dare forecast rain.

By the time bus lumbered down to where we were standing I was ready to bite the driver's head off... but contented myself with a glare and sat down... *OOOWWWW* the seats were #$%$% hot. The open window was blowing in a gentle breeze... I swear I could feel the gentleness when my skin was being peeled layer by layer.

Just in case we did not realise that it was summer... There was a huge machine spewing out HOT air to welcome us right at the entrance to the office.

Came in ready to tear someone's head off... hmph! everyone here is sitting with a scowl and the same idea in their minds... In the name of cost cutting... the office had reduced the AC...
Aaargh!!!

PS: Anyone enjoying cool weather, snow etc... Pls don't tell me about it or I shall not be held responsible for my actions .. boohoo

Languages, Accents and Places

A colleague of mine and I were discussing about accents and how the places affect it. I was cribbing that I was not able to get an american accent during my tenure there and he was cribbing that even the americans at his place were now speaking in Indian Accent :-)

Which of course started me on this journey...

In my last company, the helpdesk recorded message was changed to a man's voice that gave us the different options in a Spanish accent. What an accent!!! I used to dial in sometimes, just to hear it. Music!! Of course I would probably have suffered if I had not already known what the different options were, for it was very difficult to understand him. Nevertheless...Music!


Antonio Benderas for example, I like the Italian accented English too but not French ... Kevin Kline in French Kiss, Hugh Grant and Rupert Everett's clipped British accent (hmm though I think I like the actors better than their accents :-p) ... I will ofcourse hold back further comments on the very great hope that I might actually visit these places and research... all in the name of furthering my knowledge, you understand!

I love to hear urdu mixed hindi too.. the kind you can hear in movies like Jodhaa Akbar and other old Muslim related ones. The way they caress some words and clip others, sounds so ... posh?!
The first time I went to Cochin. I was staring at everyone wondering if they were really talking or singing... but now with time and exposure I seem to have lost the music in that language... :-(

Speaking as a perfect novice who does not understand a word of the language, the first time I heard Konkani was at a function. This old gentleman was "scolding" my friend for a long time and I was wondering how she could smile at him all through it. It was later I was told that he was actually blessing her in Konkani :-)

Oye theenk oye weel finis ze post heere ;-)

Power of Mom

God Knows I have faced many situations in life and not been nervous but I have no armour against the "Power of Mom".

I don't remember my mom ever scolding me, even when I used to get caught after doing some mischief, nevertheless her glance and the thought I might have disappointed her was enough to make me squirm. (not that it stopped me, when it was time for the next mischief)

Its funny how even now, as soon as my mom calls me by my full name and says she wants to talk to me, I start quailing.

I rapidly go through the last few days trying to find any mistake I may have done, what could mom have found ???? and start getting nervous :-p

Ofcourse most times she just wants to talk to me about something innocuous.
Guess this is one piece of my childhood that is never going to vanish.

Asianet's Idea star singer 2007 - :-(

A really big but expected disappointment for all the viewers of Asianet channel's Idea star singer reality show when the results for its mega finals was announced.

I have always wondered why a marked partiality was shown to the one mediocre singer who won the show when many really great singers were pushed out during the eliminations under one guise or another.
I am still not sure what could have initiated the three masters in the music industry to consistently give high marks to a most undeserving candidate, despite people's disgust. Because sure as hell, it was not his singing capabilities.

There was even a furor sometime back in Kerala about this one guy being consistently shown up by the judges and rumours going around that the judges have already decided that he would be winning the 40 Lakhs worth of flats, which was the prize for the first place . The three permanent judges, naturally, vehemently denied any such claims.

This was a person who should not even have come as far as the semi finals and now he seems to have won the show... all due to extreme partiality from the judges. While the best singer came up at the 4 position, the third and second position were taken up by extremely good singers... its just the first place that grates on my, and every viewer I know's, nerves. After patiently having followed it for one whole year.. I really dont think we and ofcourse the contestants, deserve to see this end.

The one good news I hear is that while most of the talented singers have been booked by music directors, no one seems to have booked this guy to sing in their movies. Sounds catty , sure, but it is good to be vindicated.

The 2008 star singer starts from April 28. Here's hoping this one is not going to be as much of a disappointment as 2007. :-(
PS: Its almost 1 AM and I am still so pissed that I cant sleep... grrrrr

मैं शायर तो नहीं...

अर्ज़ किया है ...
आपकी मुस्कुराहट ने हमे बेहोश कर दिया
आपकी मुस्कुराहट ने हमे बेहोश कर दिया
हम होश में आने ही वाले थे
की अपने फ़िर से मुस्कुरा दिया
====
कोई पत्थर से न मारो मेरे दीवाने को
बंदूक और बम का ज़माना है
उड़ा दो साले को :-)
====
वक्त गुज़रता रहा, पर साँसे थमी सी थी
मुस्कुरा रहे थे हम, पर आंखों में नमी सी थी
साथ हमारे ये जहाँ था सारा, पर न जाने क्यों
तुम्हारी कमी सी थी
====
तुम्हारी इस अदा का क्या जवाब दूँ ,
अपने दोस्त को क्या उपहार दूँ ,
कोई अच्छा सा फूल होता तो,
माली से ले आते
जो ख़ुद गुलाब हो उसको क्या गुलाब दे !
====
तुम बनके दोस्त एसे आए ज़िंदगी में
के हम ये ज़माना भूल गए
तुम्हे याद न आए हमारी कभी, और हम!
हम तो तुम्हे भूलना ही भूल गए
====
ज़िंदगी में हमेशा नए लोग आएंगे
कहीं पे ज़्यादा तो कहीं पे कम मिलेंगे
एतबार ज़रा सोच के करना
मुमकिन नहीं हर जगह तुम्हे
हम मिलेंगे :-)

My Ramblings

=> Just when you think you know everything, someone comes along to hit you upside your head and show stuff that you didn't know. Quite a humbling experience :-p
=> Read Aamir Khan's blogs, it was a bit too much like reading his diary, but he writes well and sounds pretty down to earth. (http://www.aamirkhan.com/) I know it should be none of my business, but he sure lost his shine after his divorce :-( )

=> Am waiting for the Hindi version of Ghajini... Aamir promises a different end to it. I found the tamil ending quite stoopid.

=> Dontcha just hate it when miracles are expected of you and they dont teach u any magic. *Phew* Talk about pressure.

=> A long lost friend from school popped up in messenger. Here I was feeling whinny about all the pressures in my life and there she was cheerful about her life, which consisted of having to stop studies to marry and move to a strange, war stricken country and raise two kids, while trying to convince a husband to atleast let her get a part time job. Sure put things in the right perspective for me.

=> History lesson or a 4 hour bore, I still loved Jodhaa Akbar *phew got to see it atlast. Maybe because of Birbal stories but Akbar has been one of my favourite characters from History. But Hrithik gave a whole new face to him. My favourite scene was where he tells Jodhaa that he never learnt to read. Dunno why but it touched me... and sent me on a flurry to find if it was true... (No, I still don't know)

Magic Fairy Tales

Every one of us have grown up hearing and loving the tales about Magic and Fairies. If not the ones about Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, then the tales from Panchatantra or about dragons and Knights of Romanian Legends. As a child my aunt used to tell me the story of the three little pigs and about "Huffing and puffing and blowing the house down". I remember getting frightened for the pigs everytime the wolf huffed and puffed, even when I knew the end of the story. Later when I discovered the world of words, I got an old fairy tales book, which would send me dreaming about kicking the dragon's butt and swimming with Ariel. The tales from Panchatantra from my granny was a source of great entertainment too.

I still Love the Fairy tales but now they always make me just that little bit sad.
Do you know that the Grimms Fairy Tales and the Panchatantra and the 1001 Stories of Scherezade and all the children's stories of yore are stories for adults and mostly have sad endings. :-(

Little Mermaid was my most favourite story from childhood, when Ariel and her Prince live happily ever after, it used to give me great satisfaction. But the original version of the Grimm's Fairy Tales ends with the Prince falling in love with another princess, and Ariel commiting suicide.

In the Three little Pigs, the first two pigs are killed by the big bad wolf, before it is killed by the clever third pig.
While I rue my lost innocence in having read the original versions and knowing the sad endings too, it makes me happy to see that the pessimistic views of the original authors have changed to make the stories so much more joyful for the children of today.

PS: Was seeing Shrek yesterday, all the three parts. Wow! its so cool...I loved every minute of it.,despite seeing it god knows how many times... :-)

MuRdErEr!!!!

I hear the language screaming "Murderer!!!" whenever I hear some of the new tamil songs.
Was travelling in the Cab to office today when there was this song in Radio. Gosh! I was cringing with every line the guy was singing. He was mispronouncing at least couple of words in every line...Consistently. He was tamil guy at that. I am not sure if this massacre was because he could not pronounce it right or he thought he was being stylish. The end result was extremely hard on my ears.

Asha Bhonsle or Sukhwinder Singh have the license to mispronounce the words and it can be considered funny. But its a sad state fate affairs when a person can't speak their own mother tongue right.
This is not a curse that only Tamil bears... It seems to have contaminated most of the other ones too.

On the positive note it made me realize how good an "Unmassacred" songs sounds... sigh!!!

Perspective :-)

So there we were chugging down the interstate towards Las Vegas or was it Red Rock Canyon..ummm
anyways it was evening and the 8 of us were singing our hearts out on the way to enjoy the long weekend in Las Vegas and its environs .. when what should happen but that we lose our way. It was getting on to be dark and we had taken an exit to ask our way back and there was hardly anyone around.
Worried, we were glancing around, discussing what to do next, when this lady walked out of the gas station to her car.

My friend, who was driving, immensely glad to see a human around at last, picked up the paper with the route on it and went hurrying towards her.
The lady gave him a most startled look and went running and scrambled into her car and locked it. My poor friend was waving the paper at her and only got a face full of exhaust fumes and sand for his attempt. By then we had come out of the car and were laughing at his befuddled face.
Maybe she thought he was thug or something . We were just grateful, she did not start screaming or pick up a gun and shoot him or something.
Of course we eventually found our way out and had great fun teasing him about frightening ladies in the dark.
While it was just a case of our missing someone to guide us out and startling a lady in the process for us...
What a story that lady would have had, to tell her family and friends.
There she was, late in the evening, in a deserted gas station, when a van stops and this strange foreign guy, in leather jacket and stubble, gets out from it waving a paper and walks straight to her. *Phew* straight from a movie with murder and mayhem, no wonder she went running. She probably spent the next few months thinking she had had a very close shave with something very dangerous.
Funny how perspectives work na?

Are you God Fearing?

If yes, then my next question has to be WHY?
Is not God supposed to be a kind being? Why would one fear what should be loved?

If you are wondering what triggered this tangent of thought?
I was checking out some matrimonial candidates' expectation. Invariably everyone wants a housetrained (doesn't this sound like something you expect of a new puppy... aargh!!!) God fearing girl. Or they describe themselves as God fearing.

Why did the term even get coined? Who dya think first thought let us use Gods wrath to frighten people into our control? After all Power is a great aphrodisiac.

I have read and seen movies and documentaries about how the christians were threatened with everything from maiming to death for the least bit of blasphemy or crime against the church, how the church is the highest authority in all manner of things, especially from around 12 the century to the regency period
Kali ma punishes her offenders with Chicken pox and Paralysis until she is appeased (usually with a song and walking on fire or lighting camphor on the palms etc etc)
Even the oldest Epic of Illiad and Odeysseus has its basis on the roman gods' petty nature and tendency to play with humans for entertainment.

People who can ill afford it, still clean their pockets to bribe Him with all kindsa stuff, asking for all kindsa boons. Praying is a serious Business transaction (oh! I try it sometimes too *sheepish*)
But God to me is a buddy, a pal, someone I can confide with , go for help and sometimes wonder if He exists at all.

But coming to back to my point (and yes I do have one :-))
Why should God be feared if he is not the good guy? (Isn't being evil the work of Satan or asuras or all those zillion other creatures??)

I would, of course, love any opinions/ thoughts on this topic from y'all

Bringing Superheroes home!

The kids all over the world are familiar of Superman, Spiderman, Batman, Sheena, The fly and all the comics superheroes
But India has always had its own set of superheroes for a loooong time.

The sad fact is that with the increase in nuclear families and yuppy parents, children depend on the TV and comic books for their entertainment. There are no grandmas or grandpas to tell them about these superheroes.Yes, I am talking about all the lovely mythological stories that have come down generation after generation.

How can Superman and Batman compete with the Pandavas, Krishna, Ram and all the tempermental Sages of old? Their magical powers, even when they reincarnate as humans is just way cool!
Can Dr.Who and Skeletor come near the Asuras and Kauravas?
Most definitely not! and unfortunately the kids had no way of knowing this.


But now our movie makers and animation experts have created a great series of Animation movies that bring Heroes of the Indian mythology home. Starting with Hanuman, now there is Krishna, The Pandavas, Chota Bheem, and Ganesha...(there could be more.. But I am aware of only these so far)


And even better news is that POGO is featuring these movies, every Saturday at 2 PM this month and next. Check it out and have fun!!

Sari on Women's day!

I have already let you all know about my feelings on Women's day.

Nevertheless when all the ladies (of which we are 4) in my project decided to wear sari and I tagged along too.
We entered the office and met our PM at the elevators, the guy who has never bothered to smile before, suddenly had a huge smile and a big hello for us.

By some weird coincidence all four of us entered the ODC at the same time.
The reaction was quite explosive and very amusing.

Today I knew what the models feel when they walk the ramp.
There was such a huge exhalation of surprise from the guys (of which there are many)... that people from other projects started peeking in to see what the hungama was :-)

One kid could not stand the excitement of seeing everyone in sari... he kept running around trying to see who else was in sari.
Everyone came down to our place to ask what was so special. I shan't even talk about the reaction when we walked into the cafeteria. :-)

Of course we also got sarcastic comments about how much of a shock wave it creates to see a woman in sari as they hardly wear it anymore.
And then some of the guys started cribbing about how unfair it was that there was only a women's day and not a men's day ... on which they could wear dhothi. (Guys I couldn’t agree more!!! Let us just start treating y’all like women are generally treated in the society and we shall not only have a Men’s day but I shall initiate the whole process too :-))

So far we have been getting a lot of compliments and getting teased to death. But the day is still young... let’s see what else it has in store for us.

PS: well waddya know … this is my 100th Post :-) … Thanks to all my readers (who I like to think are galore :-D) for having patiently read and commented on my many blogs.

Demo-crazy

While I absolutely love Chennai, I pity any one who lives here.Tamilnadu has always been known for its conservative society, but now it is trying to come out of that shell, and not very successfully. Other than the mentality of the people, the reason for this conservatism is that the government here always leans towards extremes and people here are forced to tag the line or else....

They are told ...
=> what to wear (Remember the actor shreya has cases filed against her because she was not "dressed" properly for some function, of course what I do not understand is how come it is ok for her to wear even skimpier dresses on screen and everyone drools over that?)

=> what to talk (Remember the case against actor Khusbhoo for sharing her opinions),

=> How to pray (Only in tamil, even sanskrit slokas must be translated and told in tamil)

=> Who to pray (Ram is not a god and neither is his "sister" Sita, as told by a senior politician in an National News Channel. I am just thankful the other religions, other than poor hinduism escaped, as the government, in its bid for "equality" opposes only hinduism and the so called forward class)

=> When to Pray (I hear the tamil New Year's day has been advanced by two months)

=> How to spend their evenings (Anyone going to Discos and pubs are asking for it... they will get arrested and harrassed by the Police).

=> What to study (Those unlucky people who fall in the forward class cannot study most of the courses as they will be filled by the so called lower caste people)

=> who should study (Dalits need not even get 60% to get scholarships and admissions etc whereas the people of the forward class need to get 99.9% and still NOT get any scholarship or admissions anywhere)

All in all Tamil nadu in general and chennai in specific is the very epitome of demo-crazy. The same kind of demo-crazy that was followed by Monarchy of old. Even the crown prince is chosen by the reigning king. :-p And the best thing about all this is that we do not so much as mutter a protest. We listen to all this and go on with our lives like it has nothing to do with us.

Carefree Childhood???

Anyone who says they had a carefree childhood is either lying or has forgotten their childhood. Happy, yes… Carefree, no.

Couple of days ago I saw an adult telling a child how lucky she was, because she had no cares and responsibilities in her life. The child, being in a mood to play, just nodded her head and ran away. But it made me think back. Sure I had a great childhood, definitely happy but would I call it care free and without responsibilities... Nope.

I definitely did not have to think about how I was going to earn my bread or what my manager would say if I did such and such and I was not accountable for my actions as much as I am today, I still had to worry about what would happen if I did not finish my homework or How to make peace with my angry friend or even how not to get caught after whatever mischief I had perpetuated.

While from today’s perspective they seem so meager and petty, at that time it was of immense importance.

And in the current world, the Kids have so much to do that they hardly have time to enjoy their childhood. School, tuitions, music class, painting class, dance class, martial arts class and if they are lucky maybe meet up with friends in between all this and play, that they do not even know the meaning of a carefree (so to say) and irresponsible time.

Looking at them sometime I feel that maybe I have a carefree and irresponsible adulthood while compared to what passes for their childhood.