Rant Alert

Had a workshop at work and this is what a head honcho told me about awards and recognition program availability.
"We have been awarding deserving employees for over a year, but there is no reason for anyone other than higher management and the actual employees to know about it. After all, if everyone heard about these awards they will feel bad for not getting it  themselves "

:-O

Now! there is a new definition for recognition. Ain't he a kind soul to be so worried of his people? Hmph!

*Gasp*

I've been good. No, seriously! I have been tempted to write about this topic many a times but resisted.

But *Phew* enough is enough. Can these people not wear some kinda deo or perfume to work?

If not for themselves, for pity's sake, for the sake of the poor souls who need to sit next to them the whole day and work.

Forgetting your deo/ perfume now and then I can understand, but coming to work without it, EVER, especially after travelling in the hot chennai weather... *GAK*

I am on the verge of getting the cold and my nose and throat are extremely sensitive to any kinds of odour and its driving me and my sinuses nuts.

Bearing up for one hour everyday was difficult enough..but now its all day everyday

grr!! Do y'all think I should get a room freshener and spray them? Would that give them a hint?

More and more...

More and more rambles that's what. I keep having all these disjointed thoughts all the time and I tell myself I should write about it here... but never get around to it. So thought instead of rambling in my mind I shall put the whole jumble of thoughts here to pick and choose to write... or not write later.

# Sometimes I fear I am becoming asocial but thankfully you cannot straighten a dog's tail :-). I think I have just come to appreciate solitude more *phew* had me worried

# Can a person feel sad and happy at the same time. I mean throat chocking sadness and real happiness? Coz  that's what I am feeling right at this moment and it feels very strange.

# We always hear so much about how good it is to give, the art of giving blah blah. But you know I have recently (ok, not so recently) realized there is an art to taking them too. I love giving  gifts but sometimes people get so awkward when they get gifts that they end up embarrassing the giver or insulting them. Totally unintentional but there you are. The problem is that it takes the joy out of the process.
A case in point is my bro, he looks so embarrassed and miserable whenever I gift him with anything, that he looks almost constipated :-P
My dad started out that way too, but I like to think I personally cured him off his giftophobia :-)
Now me! gimme a gift , any gift, anytime.. I am always happy to get them .. hehehe

#  Today a colleague told me that he realized I must read a lot when he heard me speak English. Mostly when people tell me I have a decent handle on English, I don't really take it to heart, because I am generally busy being envious about someone else's knowledge and language. But not sure why, today I felt maybe my friend(s) are right, maybe my language is decent (hmm! No I am not fishing, oh! you know me, I never fish, I straight away ask for your compliments :-D )

# I've been reading about the huge furore created over this Madrasi gal who has written an open letter to the delhi boy basically insulting delhites and punjabis etc and there have been a lot of reflex responses to it. All of us have our own misconceptions and I really think they need to get a life.
Anyways I want to clear coupla basic point in all of this. Madrasis do not wear mundu, they wear Vaeshti. While anything in excess is not good, please leave our hair oil bottles out of your altercations. We love them. They are the one thing keeping our brains from leaking out of ears in the peak summers and the reason why most south Indian women have such lovely tresses.
(Yep, I know what you are thinking, I need to get a life too.. )

Not another call!

Was at an important meeting at work and the whole one hour I was getting call after call from this number and I kept cutting it. Must have been about 7-8 missed calls. Finally the meeting was over and I get the next call from the same number. Worried now, I hurriedly cut my conversation I was having with my boss to attend it.

The caller: Hello! Is this Sanjana?
Me: Yes! yes! What happened?
The caller: Ma'am I am calling from CitiBank. Would you like our credit card?
Me: X-( grrrrr!

My first weird fone call of this morning is actually a set of calls

1st call: Ma'am I am calling from citi Bank. Would you like our credit card?
Me (Politely): No, Thanks I am not interested

Half hour later
2nd call: Ma'am I am calling from citi Bank. Would you like our credit card?
Me (Not so politely): I already said I am not interested. Could you please have my number removed from your database

Hardly 15 minutes later
3rd caller: Ma'am I am calling from citi Bank. Would you like our credit card?
Me (totally annoyed): Would you guys stop annoying me calling every 10 minutes. I am not interested in your credit card, after this morning I will never be interested in your bank. Either remove my number from your database or let me know who I should contact to get it permanently removed.
3rd Caller: Yes Ma'am. I am sorry for the convenience ..(I am getting a little appeased here).. But Ma'am may I know why you would not be interested in our credit card, we have so many features. Can I take a little of your time to explain them.
Me: (Giving up just cut the call)

An hour or so later I get another call. I am thinking if I should not attend the call, but curiosity got the better of me and I did.

Me: Hello
The caller: Is this Sanjana from ABC school
Me: What?
The Caller: Is this Sanjana who studied in ABC school
Me: Who is this?
The caller: First tell me if you are Sanjana
Me: Hello, this is ridiculous, you call me, you wont even tell me who you are and you expect me to answer you?
The caller: I am SR's mother, you both studied in the same school remember?
(Was totally puzzled. I have not had any contact with SR, who was actually my college mate,  in over 8 years and I had seen her mother probably twice all those years ago)
Me: Uh!.. oh! yes Aunty, Hello, How are you?
The caller: I am fine ma, How are you? I didn't call you for any specific reason
Me: Oh! ( As you can see, I get very loquacious when I am clueless)
The caller: I was cleaning my house and found SR's old phone book and found your number. So I thought I will call and see if you still have the same number
Me: Oh?
(Then started a third degree interrogation of my life the last few years, most of which I frantically tried to dodge and a little of boasting about SR's accomplishments which I probably answered smartly with an "Oh!")
After 15 minutes, she told me again that she didnt have any specific reason to call me and hung up.
I am still a little dizzy.
Can people really be this jobless?

Maybe I should change my mobile number. The problem with retaining a number for almost a decade is that too many people have it.

Principles - BAH!

This is a total Rant

Rant 1
Yesterday I had a call from my head honcho saying I had not completed something. Since I was outside of work and this new head honcho had put the fear of god in all of us, I totally freaked.

So I called a reportee and asked him if could verify if I had completed it, he promptly refused saying it was against company norms and all that blah.. well! while it irritated me and got me into trouble, I could respect him for standing on his principles.
Today I ask him to charge an hour extra since we will be attending a meeting at the end of the week and he again refuses because he would be coming in late. OK, Good!
I tell him to come an hour early and then charge correctly and he is now ok with charging extra without working those hours. hmph!!! I ask you, what happened to Mr. I-am-goody-goody?

Rant 2
This is another self processed rules ramanujam. (only I might have to turn into anniyan to eradicate them :-P)
He always acts like he has never veered from the straight and narrow.
To boot he gave me lip when I asked him to do something just so.
Already being in a sweet mood, I started cross checking his records and what do I find?
Mister rules ramanujam is not walking in the quite so straight and narrow path after all.
And so when I started questioning him on it, he did a disappearing act on me.

Hypocrites! Every one of them! Bah Humbug! (There! I sound just like scrooge)

Sunday Evenings!!!

Is there anything more torturous than a slow Sunday evening with nothing on the telly and no new books and only work to look forward too?
I think I hate Sunday evenings more than even Monday mornings.

And there seems to be a telly conspiracy that only the boring-est programs and movies must be telecast on Sunday evenings.

Weather conspiring against us with drizzles

My family and I are going slowly crazy and if we survive, catch you next week.

Oh! and a Very Happy Friendship day!!!

Fone etiquette

Just one point I wanted to mention

People should NOT speak with their wives/ Girl friends /Husbands / Boy friends over the phone, while sitting at their work station, if they

a) have a loud voice
b) are going to fight or make love

While it might not bother them, it has some entertainment value to the rest of us.. but is basically disgusting and irritating.
They are, after all, washing their dirty linen in public

Today we (as in the whole floor) were unfortunate enough to hear the fight between this guy and his wife. while he does make love and fight to his wife only after coming to work everyday. It was somehow louder today and I was seriously tempted to stuff his mobile ... ahh hmmm! well you get the idea

Oh! this point actually holds true if they are going to koochikoo your kid too.
Please believe me, its totally disgusting to overhear your workstation neighbour on the phone, describing her kid's cutest poop to someone.
Poop? Cute? Gahhhh! Kill me now!

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I DON'T LIKE COOKING!!!!!!!

Yes! I don't like cooking! There I have said it out loud.
And eagerly waiting for lightning to strike me dead!

Why the astonished faces, worse the ashamed face? God knows I am not ashamed of it.
No! It does not mean I cannot cook just that I do not like it.
And even if I did not know to cook, what do you care?
 Please be assured, it is not akin to serial killing.
While this may amaze and astonish ..NO! my sex is not determined by my cooking skills.

An acquaintance, whose name I did not even bother to know, met me at the pantry and us being womenfolks had to ask me the ubiquitous question.

She: Do you cook?
Me:  yes but I don't like to.
*Close up* Her Shocked face. Then a sudden clearing and ...
She: Oh! you mean you haven't learnt cooking.
Me: No, I can cook, just don't like to
She: See! you will get interest if you want to cook some dish to perfection so every one can enjoy it. *comes near me to whisper her secret* My mom does not cook a few dishes well (Guess I was supposed to Gasp with wonder here) So I learnt to cook those dishes really well.
Me: *With a get a life face*:- As long as I don't starve, I could not care less if something is cooked to perfection or not.

I could have been a pariah after that, the lady could not get away from me fast enough. What was funny was there were 3 men sitting behind us and am guessing overhearing our conversation.
When I got up to leave.. I found all 3 staring at me with the most weird look on their face.

And what do you know .. my friend just pings me to grumble about something similar
Turns out her colleague who sits in the next cubicle was totally disgusted with her for getting recipes from the internet. Wanted to know what kind of cook would check the internet for recipes and was all sympathies for her family.

I remember a colleague at my old office asking me most flabbergastingly "But you are a girl, how can you not like cooking?"

I honestly think i would be forgiven for murder, if only I could like cooking... Gahhh!!!!!
People, PLEASE get a LIFE!!!!!

CYA

Most of my industry, and I am sure all others too, have a few things in common.
One of the major commonality is CYA or Cover Your Ass.

Its funny, that even when I am talking for my team's good, my team members do not want to risk their collective asses and agree with me.

As PSR rightly pointed to me, a big part of that is indifference. I come, I work , I don't care a fig what happens outside that. If there is an issue, I will crib and grumble to my lead or manager, who ever is sympathetic. If they are not sympathetic, I will grumble to my team members and then work around it.

But ask them for a feedback or agree with you when you talk to the higher management about their trouble. You might as well be talking to the wall for all the response you get.

If by some one else's efforts their issues get resolved, they are happy. But if it is not, its still OK, as long as they are not asked to involve themselves anywhere in the process.

Can't even really get pissed with them, coz they dont want to involve in any good stuff either.

Their own worlds, their own work.
Sigh! I don't even understand this kind of attitude... :-(

Women's #$%#$% day

If I've said it once, I've said it a million times. Every year I hate the concept of Women's day more and more.
Its hypocritical, commercialised and down right stupid.
I do not see any one using this opportunity to celebrate any woman's growth anywhwere. Most people do not even have a clue why we have a Women's day. Hell!! I am not too sure myself

Every darned year I get to hear juvenile comments such as "You are so lucky to be a woman, we do not have a men's year". Please take it. Make March 8th as men's day and welcome.

What pissed me off even more this year was that the over enthu's in my team organised a WD celebration. We were all made to pay 100 bucks towards it. Anyone who does not pay will obviously be looked down upon.

So Thanks to peer pressure, pay I did. Now! I know 100 bucks is not such a big deal, but its the principle of the thing. (I would have preferred to sit at my desk and do my work rather than play)

We were all given gifts at the end of the games. Worth less stuff, I got a fevi quick stick, for God's sake!!!
I hate peer pressure almost as much as I hate the WD. We were all forced to pay for christmas celebrations too. I have no problems with christians or christmas but I am neither and dont want to be. But NOOOO, I had to play along.
The same kind of enthusiasm was not showed during pongal or Diwali.

Just leave me alone.....

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

On News and more...

God Knows why I have started reading news again. I pride myself on not reading or seeing news as it invariably makes me depressed. And I really do not need anything more to do that, Thank you very much.
But then the news also hardly varies, whether I see it today, last month or next month. The faces might change, the amount might change but it is still murder, rape, scandal and mayhem everywhere.
I am sure there are good things happening out there somewhere. But they are just not newsworthy. Who wants to see/read about altruism, awards (unless it is the filmy awards or the Padma awards .. lets not even start talking about them ) or discoveries and inventions? Hmm! unless it is Rahul Gandhi, then if he even sneezes it is for the good of the country, for he epitomizes the good Samaritan and is absolutely news worthy.

It sickens me that even the media is bought and paid for by the powerful and politically inclined.

I was trying to read Arundati roy's interview with Amitava Kumar, could not complete it as I started drowning in the ocean of her hubris. God! What a condescending, all-knowing so and so. She gets one Booker price and suddenly she is the queen of the world and the all-wise Oracle rolled into one. She is clearly blabbering in the hope of keeping herself in the limelight and unfortunately she is given all the opportunities to do so. She says in her interview that the sedition charges against her was not brought about by our government but by some right-wing crazies. I could say something about the Government, but I do not use that kind of language.

On other news, a Chinese man played games in his computer for over 3 days without any food or sleep and slipped into coma and died. Sigh!!!!

The Aarushi murder case.. the less said the better. The poor girl's murder is being gleefully made into a three ring media circus, while the police have already destroyed most of the evidence that could possibly point to the guilty. And to add insult to injury, they are making a movie out of it. Can people be more callous?
As Mark Twain said : “When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.”

tick tock

My god! time moves soooo  s  l  o  w  l  y when you are not having fun.
I have literally been counting seconds until end of day .









And I have another 11700 seconds to go.
I am so bored that I actually drew that pathetic looking clock using MS Paint.. hehehe

:-(

It must have happened to you all too.


When you were saying one thing but in your minds you were hoping for something else to happen.
Despite knowing that the chance of what your are hoping is very very less, when it does not happen you are surprised and sad.

My boss is moving on to greener pastures and being qualified, experienced, certified and what ever else you can think of, I was hoping to fill his shoes, or atleast some kind of improvement in my role.

But I knew ofcourse that the chances of that happening were less, after all the man does not even like me. Except when he wants some work done, of course.

Anyways someone else has been chosen and when I asked why I was not chosen, I was given the usual run around. I am mad and sad.

And basically enjoying wallowing in self-pity. sigh!
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What is marriage?

I have always thought marriage meant a partner to share my life with. Some one to love, fight. and generally belong.


But I am wondering if I am being very naive, even down right stupid.

Are these the same things men look for in their wives? I am not so sure.
The kind of expectations I have heard from the guys I met, makes me feel mad and sad.

One guy was shocked that I even had a say on choosing my life partner. He wanted me to fall at his and his parents feet and kept giving me hints all the time to do so.
He even told me stories about how very well educated and working women served their hardly educated and non-working husbands with great cheerfulness and live happily ever after.

Another wanted to me to quit my job, he was earning enough for both of us and I should learn to run a house within my husband's means.

Another's parents said that their son had no training in the kitchen what so ever, but could I cook for 10 people if they suddenly dropped by.The guy was sitting next to them nodding his head. These people were also shocked that I might actually want to talk to their son alone.

I really didn't know such archiac people still lived on earth. Are the guys looking for a submissive,cost free slave/servant/cook or a wife to share their life with?

What shocks me even more was that some of my relatives, women, just a few years older than me, do not see anything wrong with this kind of expectations. They think I am being too picky for not having said yes.

While this kinda talk sometimes makes me question my own judgement. I have a set of great parents and friends who are solidly behind me. Thank the good Lord!
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Hypocrisy thy name is politics

Especially if it is the current TN govt. This govt. is staunchly atheist. Which means they are totally anti-hinduism and according to their beliefs would love to totally eradicate that religion (just like small pox or cholera).OK, the central government is this kind of atheist too, but that's a story for another time.

The government went so far as to dictate when hindus should celebrate what festival and decided that the Tamil New year's day (which for centuries have been celebrated on the 14th April) will be celebrated on 14th January going forward. The CM claimed to know all about the religion, just, I am guessing, as he knows all about Ramayana too. (During an Interview with NDTV he claimed to have read Tulsidas Ramayana and it said that Sita and Ram were siblings *Gah*)

They did not  just stop with proclaiming a new date for New year. When people still continued to celebrate it on the 14th April, the priests in the temples were forced not to give any special poojas. The devotees were beaten up. All in all a great fun time for them.

Now the TV channels affiliated to the government have taken to calling this weekend programs as Vidumurai sirapu nigazhchi (Special programs for the Holidays). Is it because they do not believe in mentioning any Hindu festival name??? What happens when Diwali is in the offing I wonder.

But of course being a pure Hindu hating atheist, the government has spent 420 crores on renovating a temple. After so much hatred from them, this sudden change in mind, especially just an year before election, seems very suspect.

On the flip side, whatever their motive, we at least get another good place of worship

PS: Going off on a tangent, it has become fashionable nowadays to put down hinduism and especially brahminism, ironically its mostly done by brahmins themselves, who have no clue what so ever about their culture but want to sound cool. (Personally I think they end up sounding stupid and ignorant, but hey! that's just me)

Aaaargh!!!

I am soooo angry I could chew someone off.

I get up in the morning and see that the trees near the gate have been chopped ruthlessly to half their size.I am a proud tree hugger.

Turns out the school next door did not get enough light coz of the trees, so they sent a man early in the morning to chop them off. No permission, no information, nothing. My dad had seen the deed and hadn't seen fit to stop the atrocity.

I cannot even go scream at the school officials coz my dad had seen it and had not stopped the murderer from maiming my trees, giving an implicit permission.

AAAAArrrgh! I am in a cold war with father, but doesn't seem to have an effect.
I have to rant somewhere before I burst with frustration. *waahhhh*
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Teacher, I am NOT!

I am not a teacher. NOT NOT NOT!!! I never signed in or aspired to be one ... EVER. Despite my aunt's feelings that it is the most gentle and feminine occupation, I have never liked it.

So why, when I am already loaded down with work, am I being forced to teach a gal fresh out of college the ins and outs of the work. Especially when I cannot ditch ..er delegate her to someone else.

If she had had some experience she can fill in the blanks between what I am saying, but she is so new that I have to literally draw lines between point A and B and then take her hand and walk her down the two points.

I am told to empathise and remember that I was a fresher once too. I dont remember how I felt then, but i do know I was not stowed upon some overworked lead and made to learn.
To boot, the gal gives me the most wounded puppy looks when I snap at her for not doing something I ask her to do.

No, it does not evoke any sympathy in me. Call me hard hearted but I just dont have the time.
God! the gal can nod her head. Ask her anything and she nods. Do u understand *nod*, do u Not understand *nod* , Are u ever going to ask any questions if you have any doubts *nod*, are you trying to drive me crazy *nod*...

I understand that she is new to the system. But please god! not me! not now!

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Back to School :-(

When I was in school and lugging around the huge bags, wearing the drab school uniform and same old shoes, taking tests after tests, I used to look with great envy at my Mom and sisters. One was working and the others in college. They could wear beautiful colour dresses, jewels and shoes and most importantly a small fashionable bag was all they took with them.

What plans I had for when I was all grown up and going to work! sighhh!!!!!

After more than half a decade of working .. I seem to have returned to my school days.
I am given a laptop, that I have to lug around whereever I go. (which also brings me at the perpertual beck and call of the powers that be) AND I have mandatory tests that I have to take (with pass percentage of 85, which I am failing brilliantly of course).

Now I look at the school kids and envy them so... They have summer holidays of more than a month. Friends to play or hang out with after school. The seemingly inexhaustible energy bursting from them.

vicious cycle!!! When did I get so old?